So first, you wake up, feeling like hell and riddled with worry. This is overwhelming, but we're gonna get through it. I like to start with a comprehensive damage assessment, so we can do damage control and work out our next steps.
We'll find our phone first, there's a few things we need to look at here. Messages? Instagram Stories? Snapchats sent? Call history? More often than not, you'll be in the clear. Other times, we do silly things, like drunk call men we used to date 13 times, and I'm absolutely not speaking from experience (I am). In this case, we send a quick apology text, and keep it moving, repeating the mantra: "Embarrassment is not real. Embarrassment is a social construct". Any posts we can immediately delete - don't even bother checking the viewers - and again, we keep it moving. You're fine, we've all been there.
keep it moving. You're fine, we've all been there.
Once you've done this, you get to the big one - the bank account. Scary stuff. Even with the best pre-ing, we sometimes have nights that do seemingly irreparable damage. My go to method for the thankfully rare times that this has happened? I stare at the screen until the transactions burn into my memory, so that this haunts me into not repeating this mistake. It's a bit rogue, but effective.
If you're like me, you'll convince yourself that in the time that's blacked out in your brain, that you did something to your friends that will make them hate you forever. Not once have I actually done this, yet every time I convince myself I have. It's irrational, but if it's gonna settle your worries, just drop your friends a check in text and let their reply speak for itself.
As for embarrassing interactions with strangers, any clumsy falls or overshares in the girls' bathroom, I just remind myself - everyone else was drunk too. And even if they weren't, these are people you will likely never see again, don't overthink it.
these are people you will likely never see again, don't overthink it.
Once we've finished with all that, we put our phones away. If I'm still in clothes or makeup, I remove these, get some water and a paracetamol down, and fall back asleep until I'm a) well rested, b) ready to perform as a functioning member of society again. That is all. You'll be fine.