Historically, women have been told to be quiet. They have been told not to demonstrate their intelligence, or are simply thought incapable of it. Women have been told they must present themselves as somewhat alluring, but if anyone takes advantage, they were too alluring. To be a woman is to be a contradiction to society. Therefore, the question emerges: is it empowering to sexualise yourself? I would argue yes, it is, as sexualisation can relate to the way you conduct yourself physically, intellectually, and verbally. Sex appeal is not just based on visible characteristics, but also on personality. Moreover, ‘Pussy Power’ should not only relate to the sexual value of women, but also their intelligence and brilliance (all of which are attractive and impressive assets).
...I find the reclaiming of sexuality admirable and positive.
When I was 17, my politics teacher asked our class whether we thought Beyoncé was a feminist. The question is of note and controversial. Beyoncé is a sex symbol; consequently, people tend to look at the way she moves and the way she presents herself, rather than considering her intelligence and talents. Beyoncé was sexualised by the media when she was younger, but I would argue that she has reclaimed that. Therefore, chooses to sexualise herself in two ways. One in the way she dresses and another in the way she speaks and conducts herself. As a young woman, I really respect this, as I find her comfort in her body and sexual desire admirable, as women historically have been taught to understand pleasure as sinful. Beyoncé breaks this mould, for instance, the song “Blow” is about oral sex, and multiple songs in “Renaissance” contain sexual references, something that women have traditionally been told to shy away from. I find the reclaiming of sexuality admirable and positive. However, I appreciate that there is an alternative perspective. Some women feel that objectification of oneself for monetary or attention as counter productive.
When discussing this topic with friends, it became clear that there were mixed feelings about this line of enquiry, and I must affirm that their feelings were all granted. However, I concluded that women are damned if they do and damned if they don’t. Even fellow women judge if we believe that someone is too sexual. But why do we do this? Do we look at men when they’re shirtless and think they’re too sexual? Ultimately, this rhetoric is a byproduct of the deeply rooted patriarchal sentiment. Regardless, as I understand it, many young women feel that it is positive to seek out sex, but do not like the way some women go about it. For example, some sex workers on the internet objectify and sexualise themselves to feed into the male gaze, while simultaneously putting other women down. I absolutely agree that disrespecting other women for not fulfilling the sexual desires of their partners or not partaking in ‘enough’ sex is wrong. However, I do believe that if you genuinely enjoy something, why not make it a career? If people love singing, they are encouraged to become artists, but why is it different for people who enjoy sex?
...women are damned if they do and damned if they don’t.
My friends enlightened me to another perspective that I had never considered. There is an argument that sex workers and only fans creators, who choose that career, should show some solidarity towards women who have no other option and are forced into prostitution. A very admirable statement and belief to have. Nonetheless, I can’t help but wonder if this solidarity is extended to women who are forced or coerced into marriage. If we, as women, are showing true solidarity towards those who are subdued, should we not completely abstain from relations with the opposite sex altogether? Or become political lesbians? I, at age 20, with limited life experience, do not have the answer.
As I said, to be a woman is to be a contradiction. We get questioned if we do not put ourselves out there. We are told we are prudish or frigid. However, if we are too sexual, we are whores or disgraces. My question is, why does it matter? Sexual exploration is an individual prerogative; it has nothing to do with anyone else as long as you are safe, comfortable, and not harming or disrespecting others. I think there is power in reclaiming what we have been told to historically suppress, and if you are confident in your body and want to flaunt it, that is a beautiful thing. Evidently, the patriarchy has taught women a set of social norms that we are still trying to unravel. Hence, the contrasting views and judgment, which I would argue we as humans are all guilty of.