Absolute mad cults

In a remarkably ill-advised move, Film editors Simon Ramshaw and Emma Allsopp took on Tyneside Cinema’s ‘Cult Classic All-Nighter’. This is how it went...

26th October 2015

The time was upon me, the Tyneside Cinema Cult Film All-Nighter.  I was full of cold, but I decided to give it a go, which in hindsight was probably an awful idea.

The first film on the list was Blade Runner at 11pm.  I had never seen this film and the night was still young so I was very excited to see this.  I was certainly in better shape than the guy next to me who asked me if I was excited for the film, then did not even know which screening we were in.  I made it through the film and would give Blade Runner 8/10.

“I was full of cold, but decided to give it a go, which in hindsight was probably an awful idea”

The next film was Pink Flamingos at 1:10am.  The adrenaline was really pumping now and I could not even wait for the next screening.  But I think I could’ve waited for this one.  Including scenes of people eating dog poo (like they really did) this was certainly an acquired taste.  I could have used this time to tactically nap, but I just couldn’t tear my eyes away from the actual fellatio taking place on the screen.  3/10.

The third film was The Guest at 3:40am.  I was super hype for this because I have already seen it and I love it.  However, I was forced to chew on some indigestion medication before this film as my body was seriously starting to hate, a lot.  But Dan Stevens soon healed me.  10/10.

The fourth film was supposed to be Commando, but I claimed defeat and fell into bed at 6:30am.  What a weakling.

Completion: 3/4 films - a decent pass

Emma Allsopp

As if the fact that I’m an absolute madman wasn’t already clear, I embarked on the Tyneside Cinema’s Cult Classic All-Nighter, with a healthy dose of adrenaline-boosting films to get through the long night ahead.

“I could’ve used this time to tactically nap, but I just couldn’t tear my eyes away”

It all began with Blade Runner, a film I have a tricky relationship with anyway (my opinion on it over the years has fluctuated more than I can say), and it’s still a tumultuous affair. With two moments I outright hate, and with a chronic disinterest in Harrison Ford’s moody detective/assassin Deckard, I have problems with stretches, but it’s hard not to love the intense attention to detail in creating 2019 Los Angeles. It’s also as good an existential film about AI as Ex Machina in places, which goes a long way. From a 4 to a 9  to an 8/10. Like I said, a tricky relationship.

Feeling a little sleepy at 1 in the morning, it seems I needed the sight of a twitching sphincter to wake me up, and that’s exactly what I got in John Water’s shockingly bad-taste Pink Flamingos. Cult legend Divine comes up against some competition for the filthiest person alive, so does everything to earn back that title. Way too long, but utterly compelling, it’s an oddity that I may or may never watch again. A genuine non-applicable/10.

“A lot of belly-laughs, bullets and bloodshed in the form of The Guest

A lot of belly-laughs, bullets and bloodshed next in the form of The Guest, or what I like to call the most entertaining film of this new decade. Actually my seventh viewing of the film, it was wonderful to see others gasp and chortle at this black comedy thriller for the first time. A resounding 10/10.

Totally bottled Commando, regrettably. The sight of Arnie petting a deer would’ve been a good way to round off the intense night.

Completion: 3/4 films - another decent pass

Simon Ramshaw

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