Dating in the digital age: How often should you be texting your partner?

In the face of new technology, how many texts are too many?

Nadia Gustab
11th April 2024
Image credit: Unsplash, Becca Tapert
The face of dating has changed significantly in the last decade, creating new relationship anxieties. One of the biggest questions we all ask ourselves is: how often should I be texting my partner?

Every couple has their own communication style when it comes to texting. It’s all about finding that perfect balance where you’re both happy. Whether you’re someone who enjoys constant contact or needs your own space, establishing boundaries is key.

With texting, I believe that slow and steady wins the race. Relationship expert Rachael Lloyd suggests that “building rapport and communication piece by piece, rather than serving up a whole mouth-watering pie all in one go” is the way to go with a new relationship. Over time, this may change, as you begin to grow closer to your partner and want to stay connected throughout the day. This is also good, as it can help keep the spark alive, but remember, too much of a good thing can sometimes kill the vibe. Save some stories for when you’re together in person – it’ll make those moments even more special and exciting.

The important thing is to find a texting pattern that works for both of you and respects each other’s space

But here’s the catch, texting can sometimes mess with your head and start to negatively impact your emotional well-being. Long reply times and disappointingly short messages can really mess with your mood, not to mention getting into arguments over text. If texting starts taking over your life or stressing you out, it’s time to press the brakes and have a real talk with your partner.

Every couple is unique, so there’s no set rulebook here. The important thing is to find a texting pattern that works for both of you and respects each other’s space. So, go ahead, and keep those messages flowing, but remember – personal space is as important as communication in any relationship.

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