The word gossip didn’t always have a negative meaning. The term derives from the Old English word god-sibb, recorded around 1014, meaning god-parent; it was a term given to a woman's close friend after the birth of her child and it reflected the strong bond between them. By the 16th century, gossip had less of an emotional meaning attached to it and was mostly used to describe idle chatter and rumour as well as describing the group of female companions that would gather to help in the birth of the baby. Anthropologist and evolutionary psychologist Robin Dunbar, observed that gossiping is actually what bonded our ancestors. Dunbar argued this idle chatter gave early humans a sense of collective identity, helping them grow more aware of their environment, and ultimately leading to the high-functioning society that we have today.
When did gossiping become such a derogatory term?
Gossip has been used to define women for centuries and its stigma can be argued as an act of gender oppression. The negative association attached to the term served to destroy female sociality in premodern English society. Gossip helped women to form a tight-knit community and was actually a source of strength, boosting their social standing in a world constructed by patriarchal discourses. Patriarchal society became critical of the idea of women assembling with other women to gossip, and feared women’s growing independence from men; their increasing social power was seen as a threat to the exclusively male institutions. In the 17th century, complaints of domineering wives and accusations of witchcraft led to the scolding of gossiping. Overtime, the word gossip has transformed from representing friendship to denoting ridicule; it has been used to undermine female friendships and preserve male authority, and even in today’s society the concept is still used to degrade women.
Gossip helped women to form a tight-knit community and was actually a source of strength, boosting their social standing in a world constructed by patriarchal discourses.
How can gossip be positive?
Interestingly, according to The Atlantic, only approximately 3% of gossip has malicious intentions. Positive gossip of others not only boosts them up, but it reflects admirably on your nature. It’s important to consider even negative gossip as an act of reflection rather than an act of spite. It has been argued that gossiping actually encourages self-improvement efforts, having a prosocial effect on those who are gossiped about as they attempt to reform their damaging behavioural ways. For the gossipers themselves, like with our ancestors, it can actually build relationships between people and lend itself to the understanding of human behaviour, passing on wisdom to others so that they become more aware of their own behaviour and surroundings.
Rather than gossip being used as a tool to shame and silence women, we should look at it as a positive societal force that strengthens female cooperation.
Despite gossiping’s negative reputation, it isn’t inherently bad and its connection to women has pushed the idea that we are prone to malice and envy. Undoubtedly, not all gossip is intended with kindness and not all gossip should take place, but it’s important to acknowledge the misogynistic undertones tied to it. Rather than gossip being used as a tool to shame and silence women, as it has been throughout history, we should look at it as a positive societal force that brings people together and strengthens female cooperation.