For women in particular, this is a fine line which is often blurred, and self-confidence and a feeling of self-worth can be negatively defined as vanity, when in actual fact someone may have just put a little more effort into their appearance, or they’re simply feeling good about themselves.
`Self-confidence and a feeling of self-worth can be negatively defined as vanity, when in actual fact someone may have just put a little more effort into their appearance
The constant and unwavering pressure for women to look a certain way in society means that naturally, an obsession with appearance can occur. Social media in particular means we’re constantly reminded to have a great appearance, whilst always comparing ourselves to others. The feeling of embarrassment, however, that many women get from putting too much effort into their looks, or spending that little bit too long getting ready, is where the complexity of this relationship lies.
If you’re too obsessed with how you look, you can be perceived as arrogant and shallow, on the flip side, put no effort into your appearance, and you can be made to feel inferior to others. Social media and dating apps place so much emphasis on appearance in relation to success that it’s difficult not to focus a lot of attention on it these days. Tinder, for example, works on the basis of photos as a first impression, meaning our appearance makes or breaks our love lives.
However, for women it is often about striking the balance of looking good, whilst making out like you haven’t made too much of an effort or are being too vain. We’ve all heard people label the girl with a little too much makeup on as ‘tarty’, yet if she hadn’t put any makeup on she’d be called 'scruffy' or 'lazy'. The complexity of how others perceive vanity, and what is classed as ‘vain’ or ‘self-love’ means that all women have a difficult relationship with how they present themselves, both physically in the real-world, and online.