Examples of this might be polishing a wine glass instead of changing a beer keg, typing random letters on the keyboard at work, or perhaps even writing an article for the university newspaper instead of doing your seminar reading due yesterday.
The real question is how to pull this off in the working and student world with supreme elegance. To achieve this, you will in fact have to do the opposite of what you think. Start with asking esteemed co-workers, bosses, and assignment partners if they require help with tasks that clearly and evidently do not require a helping hand. Simply a ‘can I help with anything?’ when the person you are fooling is doing completely nothing will do the trick. Thus, making them think you’re an ‘on the ball’ worker, while simultaneously and beneficially for you, making them think you might be a little bit stupid. You see, their misconception of your mental acuity will only benefit your capacity to be a professional piece of garbage.
The second part to mastering the doctrine of ‘fauxductivity’, is the practicality of it. The question of how to be effectively lazy is simple but can be difficult in practice in the working world. The key lies in switching between your pointless tasks. Some of these tasks include: engagement in unessential activities, filling your schedule with meetings to seem busy and the fan favourite, checking emails. The following recommendations all require minimal effort allowing you to do what really matters, such as regretting your embarrassing behaviour last night, listening to a podcast of two idiots conversing absolute nonsense or perhaps imagining a life with that special someone who probably has no idea who you are. Ladies and gentlemen, that is what’s really important, right?
Overall, ‘fauxductivity’ - or whatever you want to call it - is an essential attribute of the working person. If you’re going to be lazy, do it right.