This mentality seems to be becoming increasingly popular, but so is discourse surrounding it. The main criticism of this ideology is that it is inherently selfish.
We’ve all been guilty of it – being too tired and letting your dishes pile up, using the last of the toilet paper and not replacing it, forgetting to take the bins out. It doesn’t make you a bad person, sometimes you just have those days, and it can be very easy to misplace others in the pursuit of prioritising yourself.
But truth be told, we do actually owe each other a lot, especially those that you have a relationship with. Whether someone is your best friend, significant other, detached roommate or even a stranger you pass by on campus, I would argue that you owe everyone baseline levels of respect, kindness and empathy.
We do actually owe each other a lot... I would argue that you owe everyone baseline levels of respect, kindness and empathy.
These qualities are especially important when identifying the connection between increasing levels of hyper-individualism and rising feelings of loneliness. Hyper-individualism sees you as the individual set against the group (i.e. me versus everyone else), killing any sense of community. This is a problem, especially for those of us at university, which can already be a lonely and isolating experience for some.
It would seem to me that whilst putting yourself first is important, putting effort into those around you is too. It’s never too late to message that friend back or make plans for a long-overdue study date to catch-up on life and uni work. Looking after others is also looking after yourself.
You owe it to others, and perhaps more importantly yourself, to learn and grow from your mistakes. Because, your actions do affect others, and pretending otherwise doesn’t change that. So, maybe a better turn of phrase might be “you don’t owe anyone anything at the cost of your own wellbeing”, which should help you toe the line of self-care and selfishness.