22.15 – The Babadook. Easily the scariest film of the night as it was the most mainstream horror on offer and a good way to start out. Pretty standard horror tropes, there’s a monster hiding under a really annoying child’s bed. He seriously will not stop screaming so maybe we can relate to the sinister presence in the house that tries to make the mother her kill her son. There’s not that many jump scares but the tension kept up throughout.
00.15 – Slumber Party Massacre. Is it wrong that this was my favourite film of the night? Probably. The ‘plot’ of this pinnacle of cult films is very simple; a group of hot college girls decide to have a slumber party and take most of their clothes off. Little do they know, but a man with a massive penis… wait, no, he has a massive drill that is in no way a metaphor for his penis. Anyway this guy runs about the house drilling the girls to death as well as a couple of pervy guys who were staring at the girls as they got changed. So I guess there’s some poetic justice here, right?
2.15 – American Psycho. Getting a little tired now but I love this movie so I’m powering through. Christian Bale is this big shot Wall Street guy who cuts up innocent people in his downtime. The film is actually really funny, and Bale is great in this role, channelling his inner Jim Carrey for the more comedic moments, before cutting a guy’s head off with an axe or throwing a chainsaw down a stairwell with what was, to be fair, perfect accuracy.
4.15, but the clocks went back I think so maybe its 5.15 or 3? What day is it? I’m so god-damn tired I just want – Pet Sematary. This was the film I most wanted to see, being a massive Stephen King fan. A family and their cat move to a new neighbourhood, meet a really eerie but actually quite lovely next door neighbour, and then everything goes to shit. The family cat dies and eerie-but-lovely neighbour helps the dad resurrect it. Of course it comes back totally demented, scratching everybody, smelling pretty bad and y’know being half dead. So when the dad’s child dies you know what’s going to happen…